'booking' around

i'm kinda used to bringing my book around.
even to mahjong session.
just to have something to read on the ride there.

when coming back, a female stranger approach meed when we alighted the train and asked whether i read a previous book written by the author, and what's the difference btw the previous and the book i'm carrying. i answered it's a different feel. haha.. thinking back, it sounds rather vague.

before she asked, i already felt like she was noticing me. but now i know it's my book, not me. should be around my age.

well anyway, feeling more and more lonely as days pass.
maybe he's right.
my life ain't really much.

i just get stuck within the my super comfortable world, reluctant to leave a step out.
but it's hard. karen asked me to out with pat and poh, with the rest of poh's gang.
i'm reluctant, becuz i don't know whether i can behave naturally with them, especially with those whom i have never converse with before. and it's a outing, dinner, not like a short chat in sch. can't escape if it gets too dull, stupid.

few days back, darts outing at forest pub with dear manager being the only female but still organised the outing. the pub was bigger than dartzplace, but emphasize more on soft-tip. old songs as bgm as some customers sang.. some horrible, some okay lah. generally a better place to be with than dartzplace. i liked the atmosphere better. more secluded, more spacious, a friendlier place.

after that went to partyworld till 3am at a price of 30 bucks. first ktv with dart group, but it turned out alright, and quite fun also. though i don't know if dear manager was singing or whispering to the damn mic.

it's easy to compare my psych friends with the dartz team.
i can speak chinese, have pervertic talks, and behave more like me with the dartz team.
it's me, whom i want to be, when i'm out.

searching for a companion.
is that really necessary?
but it doesn't make sense if someone just drops from the sky and decides they're your other half.

life,
lonely as can be.
love,
same as life.