got to maybe around 30 min worth of organizing work.
didn't really read anything, just tidy up the desk and file all the lecture notes.
wondering what i'm going to do with my long essay yet.
at the edge of panicking.
but given the 'everything's cool' mentality that i trained myself to have over the years, i'm probably gonna just swing thru this.
maybe i've been feeling more lonely lately.
there was always a close companion around my comfort zone.
but the past few years, it's pretty much me intruding into others' comfort zone.
old friends doesn't mean close friends.
and close friends don't need to be old.
but even so, i think i'm moving further away from myself.
i feel like going away for a while
i feel like being alone
i feel like isolation from noise and integration with signal
a structured life is my least desired path but my insecurity is killing my inner-wanting.
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